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Posts
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Introduction
– Reflections
– Island
– Irritating woman
– Observation
– Untitled
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–Reflections
I am not somebody who typically keeps a diary or a journal. I have no need or desire to. Although, I do have a confession to make before I begin this journal with the claim that I have no need of one and never will have any need of one. In the past, my field movements have been kept in a logbook when I was the top ranking officer in SOLDIER. This was more for the purpose of navigating safe pathways over open land and through hostile territory so that we could meet and battle our enemy. Some of my previous military logs and journal entries have provided small army divisions with the means of getting very close to enemy ground without harm. In the end, it won a war.
That is a thing of the past now. Quite a long way into the past, actually. I would write about the events after the Midgar-Wutai war in great detail, however, I have no need of recording my past incidents with the one known as Jenova. It is probably well documented by some idiotic humans who live in Midgar by now.
But to think that I would end up in this situation after all I have done is astounding. I am by no means a kind person. In fact, quite the opposite – I kill people without a second thought and if I was so inclined I could destroy the soft mass of brain in their skull cavity by a mere telekinetic thought. To put it bluntly, I am horrible. When I died I have no doubt that the idiotic humans of my native planet rejoiced and celebrated the fact. One is typically happy when they triumph over their enemy for it insures their continued survival. By everybody’s opinion, the people of the planet, the souls within the planet, and the planet’s conciousness itself, I should have stayed dead.
So why the hell did that Cetra ressurect me? Not even I am really sure. Her claims are that I never got a chance to be a good person, and that she wants to show me the way to it. But as much as she tries, as valliant as her efforts are, she is just wasting her time. With the way she carries on, I am guessing she wants to make a pet out of me. I believe her goal is to have me be a quiet and tamed creature who would happily sit there and never react badly to anything. While I am sure her efforts are noble and for a good cause, I simply don’t work that way. I am me, I have always been me, and I am not just about to change for anybody. Sure, I know the basic fundamentals of ‘being a good person’. But there is one thing that the Cetra has completely overlooked – and that is the the fact that I simply do not care. Her efforts are in vain, and that is basically all I can say about this subject.
Events have led me to this island, which is not on my planet. My host tells me that the planet is a place called ‘Earth’, and that we are on an island which is known as ‘Halcyon’. I have two problems with this already. The first of which, why would somebody name their planet after the substance that covers it? That does not make any sense to me whatsoever. My planet is named ‘the planet’. This makes perfect sense to me, for it is indeed a planet, and it’s name is a description of what it is. As for the island of Halcyon; to the best of my understanding, the word ‘halcyon’ is related to ‘calm’, ‘peaceful’, ‘tranquil’, ‘happy’, ‘joyful’ and ‘carefree’ – none of which occur on this island at all.
This page is nearly at an end, so I will add more shortly. There is a great deal about this place I wish to write about.
To help you out on “catching up”, I’m providing links as marks of where these go in our rps.. my best estimations at least. This entry would probably correspond here: https://seferia.net/halcyon/viewtopic.php?t=42&start=1050
Island
I am going to dedicate this entire entry to talking about an island which I am currently an inhabitant of. As I said in my first entry, it is an island with the name of Halcyon, though it’s name is not an accurate description of the land at all. It is pleasant enough, however. It is quiet, peaceful, and a contains many a good spot to sit and think. There is no civilization here. I don’t know what is in place to keep ‘organized’ society out of the island’s perimeters, but whatever is in place, it seems to work. I never see a single human anywhere outside.
The native inhabitants of the island seem to be mostly reptilian in nature. I see the occaisonal flying insect and bird, and perhaps a dragon, but I would have to say that 95% of the island population is naturally occuring reptiles that I have never seen anywhere before. Some reptilian animals are quite large in size and a number of them seem to be fairly fast moving. This particular kind travels in packs and whistle to each other like birds – all I have seen like this have large hooks on their toes for a purpose I do not know. They would stand at my height, perhaps larger. They all run swiftly, and most don’t seem to take any interst in me at all. I consider this lucky, as I do not want to be a part of their food. There are other reptilian creatures around, although the smaller ones seem to be more sluggish. I have caught and cooked one up already, but they are not terribly appetizing.
There seems to be one creature that towers over every other kind, though I have only seen it once. It makes a loud bellowing roar when it is angry, and is well over 30 feet long. It has long legs and massive jaws. What purpose it achieves on this island, I do not know.Actually, I do tell a lie. There is another human on this island besides myself (although I am not really a human to begin with, but that is another topic). There is Aeris, but she is a Cetra and that does not count. She claims to own the island, and because there is not really anybody around to dispute her claim, I suppose I am going to have to agree with the statement. Her name is Jenna, and she is one of the strangest people I have ever met. I met her some time ago now, she removed me from the Highwind back on the planet I came from and she placed me here on this island. It was the first place I encountered on this planet. She is shorter than me, has no idea what a hair brush is, and she is unusual in the sense that her eyes always look like they are on fire. She is also rather short of temper and dislikes Aeris’s personality immensely. I consider this a good thing.
She also seems to have a lot of enemies, for reasons unknown. While she looks short and somewhat helpless, she is a more competent fighter than I am in some areas. She also has a broader range of skills, and seems to get angry if I try to interfere with any of her business with others. She is not all bad, however. I have been getting to know her better in more recent times, and I find her to be of agreeable personality. She gives good back massages, and makes good company as well as good conversation. She is so vastly different from Aeris for so many reasons I cannot write here as I would run out of room. However I must comment here that it is a relief to finally interact with somebody who is not trying to take advantage of me, nor stupidly fawning over me because of my looks.
I am tired of writing now, so I will add additional material later.
My best guess is this was written in the few weeks that were glanced over in the intro here, assuming that Seph wasn’t honest about not starting the journal, or soon after this point: https://seferia.net/halcyon/viewtopic.php?t=49
Irritating woman
I wrote a bit about this in the entry before this one, but I would like to spend most of this entry writing about the subject further, the subject being the female known as ‘Jenna’. I find her to be a strange and curious creature indeed. She is the one who granted me freedom from Aeris and her ridiculous group of friends. She is also the one responsible for me being here on this island. At first, I found her to be annoying, and sometimes I still do. The woman is incredibly trying and not afraid of me whatsoever. She frustrates the hell out of me, but I don’t mind her presence.
I would have to say first and foremost that she infuriates me at times. Sometimes I believe she does such deliberately, and for entertainment purposes. I suppose I do the same to her, but nowhere near as frequently as she does to me. I will say quite openly that I find her to be an irritating woman, and I do not care if anybody finds this piece of writing to tell her that – she would probably know already.
However, there is more to her than that. As strange as this might seem, I find her to be an intelligent being. I also consider her to be an ally. The mere fact that she’s not trying to throw herself at me like a lovestruck fangirl is something I appreciate.
I don’t know her very well yet, but I suppose, like many things, she is another thing I shall have to learn about in this place.
My best guess is this was written in the time frame between here: https://seferia.net/halcyon/viewtopic.php?t=49 to here: https://seferia.net/halcyon/viewtopic.php?t=49&postdays=0&postorder=asc&start=175 but this doesn’t seem to have much of what was mentioned in that time… and he clearly refers to stuff that happens right after the second link in the next entry.
Observation
I am adding another entry to this journal because I have made a rather curious observation.The first of which being that my host has a tendency to be rather stubborn. Not very long ago she injured herself, or at least she got herself into a fight (or so Aeris tells me). The woman was badly injured to the point of one of her ribs being broken. This in turn was poking into her lung and causing her to cough up blood. I know the latter because I observed it with both plain sight, and sensed it out with my inborn abilities. Both the Cetra and myself offered assistance, yet the Cetra got a punch in the face for her efforts (I received nothing). This was mildly humorous. Now that I have written such, I suppose I should start placing this book of writings in a more concealed area for I know that the woman would moan and complain or even cry at me for writing such a ‘horrible thing’ about her. What an idiot.
Based on my recent observations, I have discovered that the Jenna woman isn’t human. She does not have the typical makeup of one, either. However, I do not know what she is for sure. I suppose I shall have to continue observing.
I feel that I am going to start over-using the word ‘observe’ soon enough, but earlier in the day I encountered more of the strange bipedal reptilian creatures outside the base. I can also say now that I know what their large hook is for – that being to slash up and rip into their prey. I stayed out of their way earlier as they disemboweled and devoured a young human adult male, approximately 16 – 19 years of age. I merely sat on the sidelines and kept myself hidden as they went about this ordeal. Despite their reptilian appearance and the fact that most lizard-like monsters from my planet are unintelligent, these creatures were swift moving, extremely calculating and clever-minded, and perhaps even graceful in their movements. They communicated to each other mostly in screeches and growls, but I could make out none of what they were saying, if they were saying anything at all, that is. It seems apparent to me that they dislike and hate humans, and thus, I would do best to avoid them. If they tried to attack me I’d soon show them that it isn’t a good idea at all.
However, that might not be the case at all. I do not know why they attacked the human male today and not me. Jenna’s pet metallic lizard caught me by surprise shortly after the incident occurred and tried to tell me that the pack was not after me at all. Based on her aggression and hostility however, I must wonder what kind of creature she is. Or was? I do not know.
At least I have more or less the entire story on whom attacked Jenna now, and why. I have also learned more about her, which I don’t think she would mention in every day conversation.
I choose to finish this entry now.
This entry has a very definite time frame for me to help you with. It refers to events that occurred from here: https://seferia.net/halcyon/viewtopic.php?t=49&postdays=0&postorder=asc&start=175
and ending here: https://seferia.net/halcyon/viewtopic.php?p=10889#10889http://www.seferia.net/halcyon/viewtopic.php?t=42&start=600
A/N: getting lost, read on from here to summarize rest of this
The only time in which this entry could have been written is when Sephy was waiting for Jenna to wake from her several-day long healing sleep.
I have decided to add another entry to this archive. There is much to catch up on, so I will summarize some and add important details as needed. At this current point in time, I am writing from inside the Halcyon’s base, waiting for Jenna to wake up. So much has happened recently, I don’t really know where to begin. This encounter stated when Jenna and I visited a council of dragons. This was done because Jenna needed to. They requested she retreive an artifact from one of the human territories, so off she went, intending to leave me behind.I went with her anyway as she has a talent for seeming to get into trouble.
It was here she shrunk me to the size I was when I was 10 years of age – and although she explained the reasoning behind it, I still disagree with her logic! If she had just told me where to go, I could have just teleported there. I am much more skilled at teleporting than that woman ever will be, and if she would only ask for my help, I could make things much easier on us all. Damn her logic. But the insufferable woman made me do it anyway, and into the facility we went. To add insult to injury, she stood on my head, among other things, such as namecalling. Which is utterly immature and ridiculous.
Utterly immature and ridiculous woman.
We crawled through air ducts as it was the best way to get to the required area. Actually getting the artifact was a hassle also – it’s clear we do not work well as a team. I kept blowing her cover as it were, or she was doing things I would not normally do. Perhaps with some better communication in the future, we might be able to co-ordinate something great. We retrieved the artifact shortly thereafter and it was less than interesting – a rock. How anticlimatic. I was expecting gold, or something archaic and intricate. Dragons normally horde interesting things. Why the hell would they want a stupid pointless boring rock? Who the hell would want a stupid rock anyway, apart from a geologist? Those people are boring. They are also dirt-shovelling losers. I hate scientists!
After the pointless rock was retrieved, Jenna teleported us to the roof of a building some miles away. After returning me to my normal size, she handed the pointless rock to me and… abandoned me. That is correct – the stupid woman abandoned me in unfamiliar territory and in on an unfamiliar continent to fend for myself. I am perfectly capable of doing such, I am self-sufficient. However, to leave without saying goodbye is the pinnacle of rude. She did not even really hint at the fact the mission was over.
I kept her stupid rock in my subspace and persued her. My tracking led me to a place where idiots with low IQ collect to engage in mundane tasks such as hitting coloured balls with sticks on a table, and throwing small pointed objects at numbered circular boards. They are called ‘darts’, but they do not look much like their weapon counterparts. I forget what the other game is called and I don’t particularly care.
I soon found the irritating woman. I kept myself invisible so she would not see me. Some people might call that stalking or eavesdropping, but some people are also stupid. In any case, she was… engaging in an intimate affection act with some random intoxicated idiot male whom I’ve never seen before. I highly doubted she knew whom he was at the time either. In any case, I was livid. How dare she waste all that time collecting a pointless rock, only to leave to do something even more pointless like that?! I was furious to say the least. I wanted to kill that male. And to be honest… I wanted to be in his position. But I was not.
Rather than causing a scene in a public place, I shoved him to express my feelings and left before things would get out of hand. I flew away, but I didn’t really have a destination. I don’t know why Jenna followed me. Maybe she was concerned for my feelings, maybe she was angry that I interrupted her. I’m still not sure if I really know. However, I was gravely insulted by her choice of male, that much was certain. She seems to be good at reading one’s feelings, though. And perhaps, too good. I am fast discovering that it is hard to hide from her. Even though I tried, she seemed to pick up on my jealousy and insult rather quickly. We exchanged words and she tried to delve into my feelings, asking me to express them. But I am not somebody who does that.
It was at this point that she kissed me. And despite my huge vocabulary, I don’t really have any words to describe that. It was amazing. I did not know such a simple looking gesture could be so nice. It did not last long however – I was so distracted and lost in that kiss, we lost sufficient altitude that Jenna ended up scratching her back on a tree branch.
At this point, we decided it was best to spend the rest of the day at a hotel. At the time I thought it was so Jenna could get adequate rest. Thankfully the town is big enough that one was quickly found. It looked a bit old-fashioned, but it was adequate. The view in the room was nice enough, but the decorations were as ridiculous as could be – a heart shaped bed, pink furnishings. Ribbons. It was the kind of room that Aeris would love. I wasted no time acquiring more tasteful coloured sheets for the bed.
What happened next, I don’t know if I should really archive it here. Maybe I should, as a warning to myself not to do it again in public, or with any chance of being caught. This journal is intended to be private. Nobody is going to read it anyway. I suppose I will go ahead and add it. Hmph.
Jenna caught me pleasuring myself. She was in the shower for a while, and so opportunity presented itself. I don’t know why I decided to start doing it there, but it was utterly careless of me to do, and I shall be much more cautious in future so that she does not ever catch me again. Apparently she had finished her shower when I was in the middle of my private relaxation technique. I am eternally grateful that she did not make fun of me.
However, maybe the utterly stupid decision was part of my fate. Being caught in a potentially disasterous situation led to the most intimate experience I have ever encountered in my entire lifespan. Shortly after catching me in my moment of self-relaxation, she invited me to have sex with her. I was unsure of it – I didn’t want to hurt her. After everything I had read about the female genetalia and penetration, it sounded like it really would hurt her – if the female genetalia is anything like the male’s, then that area is sensitive. However, she did everything to assure me that it would not hurt and so I ended up giving my consent. It was an intelligent idea for her to be the one on the top of the partnership as she was obviously the more experienced. Still, despite her comments on penetration being anything but painful, I was careful and considerate – the last thing I would ever want to do is hurt her.
It felt strange at first. Certainly not dislikable, but strange. Jenna was more than willing to guide and teach me throughout the entire process. Everything from the physical sensations, the close contact and our emotional bonding was wonderful. She also pulled out her wings, which was only an added bonus to everything else. Being so close next to another body in that manner is something I will never be able to put into words. I suppose I was clumsy at first as it was something I had never done before. But Jenna is a wonderful teacher as well as very compassionate and understanding. Not to mention gentle. Her touches were both soothing and powerful. I wanted to give back what she was giving me, and with her guidance, I suppose I did in a way. When I was unsure, she guided me. When I gained enough confidence to add my own efforts to the rhythm we had found, she encouraged me as much as she could. And when I reached orgasm, she was there with me. I am not sure how long we were engaged in the act of sexual intercourse, but it is an experience I will never forget. The intimate closeness we shared after the event was almost as great as the experience itself.
As I write this entry, Jenna is still asleep. I do not know when she will wake up again, but she needs her sleep to heal. I have been asleep myself for a period of time, but I cannot sleep for too long at a time. I am too concerned. I also wanted to write this down before I forget it. However, parts of it, I never will. And don’t want to.
The memories of what happened in that hotel room are still so fresh in my mind – the way Jenna touched me, and moved with me so perfectly. I am guessing it is only natural to feel attached after something so intimate. For all the times Jenna has shown hostility and aggression, she has shown tenderness and affection. I’m still not sure I can believe we really went through with it. But we did, and it was good, and… I want to do it again. It’s been too long already. I want to be with her again.
But I need for her to sleep right now, to get well again. And I need more sleep myself. Thus, I choose to end this entry here, until another time.
It’s very quiet.
I do enjoy my silence, but not when it is like this. Jenna is currently asleep, and has been for some time. I do not know when she will wake up again. She is still healing.
There is nothing to do here. All I can do is sit around and read books. There is no point in requesting a game of chess with the computer device here either – it will work out the most probable way to win against me in as few moves as possible before the game has even begun.
I am bored, and Jenna is lying there and doing nothing. There is not much more I can add to this entry, except for my expression of wishes that she heals from this ordeal and makes a complete recovery.
That is all.
The only time in which this entry could have been written is when Sephy was waiting for Jenna to wake from her several-day long healing sleep.
How utterly maddening.
Is this woman leading me on a wild goose chase? Is she taunting me? We spent some time in other places, other planets or realms to be exact. Jenna decided to open otherworldly portals to new places for reasons unknown to me at first.
We went to an utterly stupid and pointless bipedal animal place first. It was identical to the human world here currently in the sense that there were buildings and civilized/organized society (organized is debatable), but every inhabitant there was a standing hominidae-like evolved creature. Felids, canids, bovines, ursine, draconic, whatever subclass of animal you could think of, it was there. Though curiously, there was no Behemoth bipedal creature, or anything that really looked like the monsters of my planet….
…and probably just as well. I do not want to ponder the thought that a Beach Plug could grow legs like a human and wear a business suit and a tie. That is positively RIDICULOUS. The point is, I hated it. It was stupid, and Jenna used her magic abilities to turn me into that grey bipedal feline abomination yet again. Though this time it was a means to blend in, not a form of punishment. It was a mix between enjoyable and intolerable.
Enjoyable for the fact that it was mildly peaceful, intolerable for the fact that she permanently altered me upon turning me back into my former self. Humans, and general human-like hybrids are NOT supposed to purr like cats! Thanks to that idiot woman, every time I feel extremely content, I begin to purr. I suppose I can live with it in the sense that I do not feel content very often, and my enemies cannot use it as a tool against me, or a means to laugh. But that is besides the point!!
We went to a restaurant that served food that was either raw, or still moving. If you are going to serve me food, I at least like it to be dead first, thank you very much. I expressed my utter distaste, and Jenna listened, for she opened another portal and we vacated that horrid place forever.
We arrived in another city next. This next one had ridiculous radio active monsters that ruin cities and destroy planes. Not much to write about here, but once the monster woke up, we left.
Ended up in a tranquil stupid place next. Long placid dragons, a monk’s temple. Not my ideal place to be. A monk lent us his house to stay in, but when nightfall came, it turned out that he was one of those stupid dragons. He had NO idea what personal boundaries or privacy meant, so Jenna and I moved into the mountains. It was here that we argued, and then she shoved me back to her island via another portal.
About this argument – she plans to annihilate the snake, along with herself at the same time. If I didn’t care about her, I wouldn’t care about this planning at all. But because I do care, I expressed my opinion and offered advice. She very much didn’t appreciate it and kicked me out of that reality altogether.
Now I am back in her base and trying to solve a riddle. Which was the original point of this entry. I am writing down only the relevant parts which I found of interest, and which I feel will help me. This versed poem she wrote means something and I intend to find out just what it means exactly.
…let’s play a game.
I’m certain that we might both gain.
Or perhaps not at all.I know what you want.
Yes, yes, I might even possess.
Of course, then again,
That might be yours to assess.Note: Ownership of something. Snake wants it, Jenna has it. I am certain of this.
Dare you enter this realm?
Do you even know what it is?
Have you drifted so far from your path?
Do you forget the purpose of this quiz?Note: A place? Possibly an existence that can be accessed via portals?
Seek between the lines,
And then even deeper.Note: Definitely hidden, I am sure of it. Possibly already mentioned, but cryptic.
I’ve watched the recording half a dozen times already, and it really does not make much sense. I just wish I knew what had happened to Jenna when she made this recording. This really is not the female I am used to – this is not my ally. I don’t know this person at all.
As I write this, I have to admit right now that I am personally affected by all of this. I do not know what is wrong with me, but the only description I can think of right now is ‘concern’.
However, using the descriptive ‘concern’ for my next topic would be a gross understatement.
I hope to find out about immortality bonds. I am pretty certain that if I found out how to break Jenna’s, she could kill the snake without having to destroy herself in the process as well.
I would really rather she didn’t destroy herself… it is not every day one finds a completely tolerable companion to share intelligent conversation with. I very much enjoy her company, I enjoy her closeness, I enjoy her in general. This female utterly infuriates me at times, but.. I don’t want to lose her. Not now. Not after finally managing to gain somebody who is like myself. That in itself is valuable.
I will find out how to break her immortality bond to the snake. And then I shall break my own to Aeris.
And then I shall find a way to join Jenna and myself together.
I have not wanted something so much in such a long time, but I want to work on this to the best of my ability. The answer is somewhere, I need only find it.
Another clear time frame for me to help point out. This entry refers to events that start here: https://seferia.net/halcyon/viewtopic.php?p=10942#10942 and clearly end here: https://seferia.net/halcyon/viewtopic.php?p=12092#12092
~Annoyance~
Jenna is a hypocritical bullshit artist.We got into an argument over something completely ridiculous and now she is being utterly unreasonable with me. I can’t go outside – I will get into trouble for that. I can’t do anything that involves going anywhere for any purpose as I will probably have to face her wrath for that as well. We seem to be having an argument, but it is mostly her trying to assert her dominance over me, now.
The story: Apparently I abandoned her after we last had sex – this claim is purely bullshit. I was with her in the afterfact, and she was the one who left, not I. After that, she left the base and the island entirely to go buy supplies for the infant. The only ‘abandonment’ I did was when I needed to buy food, and I suppose I am banned from doing that now as well. She will not even negotiate the issue with me. I am not allowed to explain my side of the story. She has misunderstood my intentions and I am being blamed for it.
I’m not even going to bother trying to explain it to her, now. There won’t be any point – she’ll find a way to turn this onto me, and then it will be my fault again. I can’t go outside and sit somewhere alone – that will probably be classified as abandonment yet again. I can’t do a damn thing right now.
I can’t leave, I can’t talk about it, and if I sit there and act annoyed, I will probably be asked what the hell is wrong with me. And there is no point in explaining it because it will be turned on its head and then it will be my fault all over again.
I am screwed no matter what I do right now. Perhaps I should start a habit of asking her for permission before leaving to do anything. That is about the only way I can think of where I can do as I need to without getting into trouble for it.
Useless damn annoying witch. There was purpose in patrolling the farm. There was purpose in keeping watch, because somebody actually turned up to harm us – try telling me it was pointless after that! Could I have used my telepathic abilities to sense out danger? Yes, but it doesn’t work after a certain radius. And sometimes I like to use my sight instead of relying on my senses all the time. If a psionic abuses his abilities continually, he will become lazy.
Stupid woman. She doesn’t understand the purpose behind my actions and she sees it as avoidance of duty. Idiot. Part of it WAS enacting on duty. I don’t know how the hell she saw it as a means of avoiding my responsibilities.
Damn annoying woman!!
Written around this part in the RP thread: http://www.seferia.net/halcyon/viewtopic.php?t=59&postdays=0&postorder=asc&start=375Most likely during Sephy’s night sleeping in his library.
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